Friend like Him...

A friend is always loyal,
    and a brother is born to help in time of need. 

Proverbs 17:17 NLT

Do you ever get that feeling of amazement when you're reading a Verse that you've read many times before and suddenly it says something so much deeper? I do, and today as I felt God asking me to sit with Him and share this message with y'all it's one of those days. This is the first time I have realized the last line of Proverbs 17:17 has a totally different meaning than I've understood it since the first time I read it. I have usually read it in other translations and it says, 

A friend loves at all times,
    and a brother is born for a time of adversity.

Proverbs 17:17 NIV

For me the last line has always meant that my family will be a struggle? I have always thought it meant that my friends would always love me and that my family will always be a struggle...WOW was I off!!

 I love when God brings His light of understanding into my confusion. He is faithful like that, I see just how faithful He is in ALL He does in me and my life. I now understand that the part He has been working on in me, is "how to be a Friend like Him."

I decided that to truly understand what it means to be a "Friend like Him" I needed to understand the definition of LOYAL. So I found several definitions and all included most of these words; undivided, content, and support. My favorite was on Your Dictionary, it says...LOYAL-

Having or demonstrating undivided and constant support for someone or something.

This definition really just spoke to me. It confirmed exactly what Pastor Bill said this past weekend in the series "War Buddies." He said that a real friend is LOYAL even when it costs them. What I heard when he said that was that in good times, in bad times and in ALL times, a real friend is there. 

They don't run when the times are overflowing with joy for you or them, they stay and celebrate with you. They don't run when the chaos overtakes you and you lay in a dark pit of self pity, they stay and pray with you and share God's truth, even when it's hard. They don't run because you take a word of love and a message of truth from God to them, and then fumble with the delivery...they stay and help you learn to hear God's whispers of encouragement and share the hard stuff with God's gentleness, His love and how to allow Him to be heard. 

I don't know about you, but I haven't been really LOYAL to very many people. I am not saying I am not LOYAL, I am saying that many times I have run away at the wrong time. It's hard to look in a mirror sometimes and see the truth. But it's necessary to look into the mirror to see the parts that God points out. Then we can recognize those little pieces of pride and darkness still in us and give them to God. 

 God is faithful to allow me to be thoroughly tested in the areas of pride and self pity. Especially in the area of friendships. Many times I've thought of people as a friend only to find out that my definition of friendship and theirs are nothing alike. I jumped in with my whole self thinking that I had a friend. I can be overwhelming, I am excitable, I'm an extrovert who loves to talk...to everyone. So God created me for a specific kind of friend. Not everyone was created to be my "War Buddy" and I was not created to be everyone's either.

He blesses me with so many gifts, one of which is discernment. This gift is more like an automatic weapon in my hands at times, especially when I believe someone is my LOYAL  friend. The LOYAL friends that God has blessed me with so far, well after they've had the gift of me wielding my weapon of truth blindly, I can count on my own hands and maybe have fingers left over. I felt blessed to have this gift, but after losing people I thought were friends, I felt like it was more of a burden than a gift. 

That's why God is so faithful to keep teaching me. Yes there were people I truly cared about that walked away, some with out a word, others still pretend to be a friend when we run into each other. I have struggled with God over some of these people that I dearly loved like family, and I have begged Him not to take them, to bring them back...but God is faithful and He wants us to not only have life, but have life in abundance, that's what it says in John 10:10. 

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.

When I read that bit of truth it helps me to understand, those He walks out of my life would keep me from having life abundantly. They were placed for only a season, for God to use to make me more like Him. The struggle mostly lies in being able to keep that truth etched in my heart because it's painful. Especially when the wrong people are part of my inner circle and God knows that eventually I will let go for my peace. When I've fought God about taking some out of my life, the enemy can use that to get in there and cause major problems. Situations God won't be glorified in. I have found the easiest way for me to let go and not be bitter is to pray for them. If I am asking God to bless them and keep them I can't be angry with them and God will swiftly put a stop to me praying for them to "learn."  What I end up learning is that it's me that needs to look into where my heart was. Why am I asking God to teach them? Am I the all knowing? 

In less than a month God is taking me to my annual retreat. There are women there that know parts of me that only God knows, these are my sisters. I'm so excited to see them, to hug them, to hear them and know that God will be speaking through them...sharing His heart with me. When I am with them, I am me. I can live BOLDLY for my Poppa, my Savior, without fear of rejection. They love the Jesus in me. 

 It's not easy to be LOYAL, but we have to be LOYAL if we want to be a "Friend like Him." There will still be those little testers put in the mix, to help us learn to choose LOYALTY over envy, frustration, and so many different negative choices. That's how He creates in me a clean heart, how He refines me, and how He makes me a "Friend like Him." The choice, as always, is mine...