So, I'm 47 years old, and at times I think I need my mom...then my Heavenly Father takes me by the hand, and whatever the reason was, that I was thinking I needed my mom for, He holds me in His grace and speaks ever so gently to me....."Come unto me, Abide in me & you will have my peace".......and of course He is right, He can never fail. So, though I love my mom dearly, at this time God has a different plan for us. A plan to give us each hope and a future, not to harm us....my favorite Scripture tells me this Truth, God's Truth. So I trust, and be still, which is a difficult thing for me to do, be still. But this Mother's Day, the only one left in my immediate family, besides my mom, is my sister, & she is here. For the first time since she was a teenager, we are under one roof, and I have to be honest, I've got this peace, Jesus's peace......God is good all the time!!!
Matthew 10:34-36 clearly says Jesus's intention.........“Do not think that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I have not come to bring peace, but a sword. For I have come to set a man against his father, and a daughter against her mother, and a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law. And a person's enemies will be those of his own household.
Well this rings true in my life. My mom & I no longer have any contact, sounds sad, but let me open up this can of worms. What better day to do it than Mother's Day, the day I should be spending time with my mom....but that is not God's plan for me at this point in my life. Sometimes, like today, I can't help but say some extra prayers for her & hope she's happy. I'm feeling pretty sure that I wont see my mom again......but then again, God's the Author, I'm simply the talent living out His story, my life. But this year, we really only saw each other a few times. That isn't really that different from other years we just couldn't get along. These last several years of my life, I've been fumbling around trying to live the life God has planned for me. Not that I haven't failed several times, I have, but the last couple of years I really am beginning to hear God guiding me.....and so I will react a little quicker to His molding. His plan for my relationship with my mom, is to move her across the country, with out a word from her.....the latter part of the plan, really isn't His choice, it was hers. But today, it is hard....until I approach my Father in prayer & ask Him to keep my eyes focused on Him, no pain.
But, as if in answer to the prayers I pray continually, and especially about my kids. I not only pray it, but ask for prayer for it, anytime I can!!! He blessed me with a view of me, through Sweet Hubby's, Jr's, and little girls eyes!!! This view was detailed today at church, when the guest Pastor spoke, he said, "we're God's plan A & there is no plan B!"........that is a strong statement....true, but strong......he shared that our lives, choices, who we are in God, are in plain view at all times, not only by God, but by others as well....I'm paraphrasing what I heard in His message via a wonderful guest Pastor from Central Christian, Pastor Cal. His finishing message was the kicker for me......I am the one eyed, cataract in the other, covered in muck, ugly pug......but I'm no longer that version of me, no now I'm the one who is taken and bathed, God took me into His family, He's cleaning me up!!!
I'm the one who has the family who loves me dearly, and something that speaks their love loud & clear is this......the cards they shared with me today, Mother's Day, 2013.......this day God chose to speak to this mom, through her family......each of their cards had the same description idea of me, their wife/mom....the description of what they see when they look at me, covered in sin, or covered in grace.......they see my faith, they see God, the center of me......how I have cried tears of joy today, felt elated, lifted praise & let me say, give Him all the glory for who I am......I am a daughter of the Most High Father.....I am REDEEMED in Him......I am loved, but most of all, there is less me, and more Him.....and my family, they see that.
Sweet hubby just reinforced my joy today when he shared that Jr, read and picked his card for me, and little girl got hers a month ago.....and in it, it says......You are a beautiful reflection of God's love.......
Happy mom's day, if you are a mom......if you are one of soooo many who struggle with infertility, miscarriages, and everything that goes along with those issues, please know that I'll be lifting you in prayer on this day........God is good & He has a plan to give us believers hope & a future.....
So, my prayer is always that I will be a teacher/example of Faith, that I will be a giver of Hope, and most of all, God's earthly example of Love......always.....
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