Friday, May 31, 2013

How can I point anyone in God's direction, if I'm not pointing there myself????

This I was going to write yesterday. I just got too busy, then too tired. So here it is today. I have shared that one of the gifts God blessed me with is discernment. To me this means I recognize when God's speaking to me, showing me, or giving me insight into other's situations. Also mine, when I don't ignore Him cuz it's uncomfortable for me.....well I ALWAYS give in & listen, just maybe not act accordingly.

Recently, a very inspiring, loving, giving, God loving friend of mine, shared her main gift is discernment. She told me directly, this can be a very lonely road....which is very true for me so far. The next day however she shared with me what she's learned about the gift of discernment....."when God shares something with you, it isn't always to open your mouth and spout it out, some times we are to simply lift this info back up to Him in prayer".....this bit of info FLOORED me!!! I felt as though I immediately understood & it was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.....yes this is it. The answer to my prayer to Him, what????why????who????how????? It was glorious, truly I felt sooooo good!!

I am learning to accept what God puts in my path. I don't always accept it in a good sport kinda way, but I accept it........and know it's for a reason, and that reason is usually to bring someone closer to Him, or answer someone's prayer, or to remind me of Who's in control. Recently our home has become filled to capacity. Let me explain something that might make this more descriptive & understanding to you. We live in a 4 bedroom home. We got this bigger home because Little girl & my Princess had moved back home & we needed the room. Then Little girl decided to try another shot at making her relationship with my Princess's daddy, let's call him.......Lost boy. So they moved out & back in with Lost boy & his family. So for several months we waited to do anything with the 2 extra rooms upstairs, just in case they came home. Finally after many months, we let Jr have Little girls old room, made Jr's old room a guest room. Then with my Princess's room I created a comfy office for our home. Now while we were taking care of this, Sweet Hubby decided to finally put his man cave/game room together. So, up his pool table went, he hung shelves, and put his man stuff up on them. He really put his all into making a space for him & his friends to hang, if they came over. But honestly, all those rooms sat vacant, except for Jr's.

Then I got a message from my Sis, saying that she was coming to AZ, she & her hubby had, had a physical fight, and she was taking her 2 kids & anything she could grab & fit in her tiny car & leaving. I asked where to, she said staying with a friend. But those plans fell through, which left her & her kids homeless.......yes Lord, I hear You. So after speaking with Sweet Hubby, we offered for her & the kids to stay with us. We did after all have a couple of empty rooms. Now, her children do not know me & my family from Jack & Jill down the street. We've only met them a handful of times in their lives. In fact, due to an insecure mom, we really didn't know each other either. So, here we are all getting to know each other, live under one roof & keep the works somehow.

But a couple of weeks after Sis coming from New York, Little girl decides she just can't take living at Lost boy & all that entails. So home come her & my Princess........which brought both joy & uh oh to my heart. We moved some around & now Little Girl & my Princess have moved back into my Princess's room, Sis & her kids are in the guest room & Jr is in his room. Our home is filled to capacity.

Now, since we have 3 different families, with 3 different ways of living in one home......yes I have gotten stressed at times. As everyone else has too. But the last week or so, I've let the enemy get in there & steal my joy. The joy I get when serving my Heavenly Father. It's brought up all my old favorite sins, gossip, anger, frustration, and making mountains out of molehills. I could hear my Father saying to me "keep abiding in Me, I have your peace, I have the answers, I have a plan", but I was not hearing it. I was wrapped up in the worldliness that is so easy to fall back into, if we don't let God keep a tight hold on us. When searching for the Scripture I wanted to share today, I searched "serving God joyfully" the Scripture was just what He wanted to say to me, for me to share with you & keep in my heart during this amazing chance to serve Him & be a beacon pointing to Him for happiness, peace, unconditional love. Here goes.....

1 Peter 4:9-11

New International Version (NIV)
 Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.  Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.  If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

So, have I been serving God???? Have I served Him with the joy He alone gives while serving??? Or have I said yes to Him, then turned & let the selfishness of pride, boast about helping others????

Well, He clearly pointed out to me that I wasn't serving Him, but the enemy. I was letting all the tiny frustrations, grow into huge angers, then shoving the angers down........then He shared a truth with me. If I continued to shove the tiny frustrations down, the anger was going to blow....and that family I've been longing for, well they'd walk away, not only from me.......but from the One Who brought them to me to serve in the first place, God. He didn't only bring them here for me, He brought them here for me to serve, to be His light in their worlds of His joy in sadness, I'm the one receiving a second chance here. At this moment, I choose to share my feelings with them, not at them, blame them, just share what does frustrate me. Share that we were used to a routine, that only included.... Sweet Hubby, Jr & me......we were spoiled by the quiet, being able to take off & enjoy the day, just kicking back & watching tv together.......but they are not in the way, they aren't a pain, they aren't too much to deal fact it's the opposite. They are a joy, they are family, they are a gift from God.

So, on the way home yesterday, I heard Father's calm voice reminding me that I'm not serving them alone, but I'm serving Him. I'm being His hands & feet......He's working through this simple woman.....a woman who seeks to do His will......Always....I'm not however serving Him, if I'm grumbling about it.....I may as well not be serving, because it's worse to serve Him while complaining about it.....right!

 They don't know Him, won't know Him, can't know Him, if I don't be the woman God's molding me to be, more like Him. If I don't live as He is teaching me, step by step, how will they see that it can be done????

So, How can I point anyone in God's direction, if I'm not pointing there myself???